Funk

A few months ago while Ella was having a little struggle to make good choices, Dustin referred to it as being in a "funk".  As I was folding laundry today my mind was overwhelmed with things I want to do, goals I want to set and things I don't want to do but have to be done.  I have been having a hard time getting ANY of these things done lately because I keep overwhelming my mind with new ideas - random ones and doing those instead.  I realized, I am in a "funk" and need to get out.

Alissa, Molly and I picked up lunch and went to the park and played.  Didn't have any friends meeting us there for once and hardly anybody was there at all.  It was quiet, warm and things slowed down for a minute.  I realized something I have learned before.. none of those "things" matter.  These little people and the good man I married are my priority.  They don't care about fancy games or new dinner recipes.  They don't even care about what sweet coupon deals I got that week. (sadly) :)  What really makes them happy is just time together.  Spending time playing, singing, running, riding bikes, watching their tricks over & over & over & over again. 

I have learned that when you put your priorities in order those little things fall into place if there is space enough in the day.  My priorities have been slacking.  My house has been more messy than normal, we haven't had a regular scripture routine for a few months, I haven't exercised in a few weeks, our budget has been out of line.  It seems so hard to get out!  I thought about how often I prayed for Ella and how much I hoped she would make better choices and realized once again that I am a child just as Ella is.  My Father in Heaven hopes for me to make better choices.  It must be hard for Him to watch me slack and hope that I will start moving forward.  Maybe not too because he knows the outcome. 

Being a mom is hard work!  The hardest job I have ever had - hands down!   Finding balance in our lives is so hard.  Things get busier and busier and more and more good things become available to us and we have to remember our priorities.  Remember that those good things MUST come after the better things and the better after the best.  I will try harder.  I will be better.